Friday

A New Perspective

So last night was an activity organized by the RS for a panel of social workers to come and speak to us about mental health. Those in my family understand when I say I was NOT INTERESTED in attending this event, but, being on the RS activity committee, I felt I was obligated to go. After arriving and feeling entirely un-needed, I was contemplating how I might manage to get out of staying, but decided it would just be easier to sit through the darn thing. I don't know if I would go as far as to say I was glad I stayed, but I did learn alot and I thought I would share a new perspective I found on parenting.
I guess I had never really sat down and thought about what parenting really was. I mean, I just feel like I am barely treading water and thank goodness Sam is still so little and doesn't understand half of what is going on because we are still really trying to figure out our parenting approach. A key point that was brought up among the discussion last night was that as long as what you are doing, whether it is teaching or discipline, is actionary parenting versus reactionary parenting will most likely be effective, no matter what the method. This was a bright light going on in my head. If I choose to take action before I am required to react, then 99% of the time things will go better!
Let me give you an example that really hit this home to me; a young mom in our ward said her daughter had gotten into the scissors and she had gotten angry and was telling her mother about the incident later and her mom simply replied with asking where the scissors were before? In thinking about it, the young mom realized she had left the scissors out on the counter where the little girl could get to them and then cause trouble. And also the biggest example of this is getting angry when your child misbehaves. No matter what the punishment, if it is a reaction to the anger, it isn't going to be as effective as you want it to be.
Anyways, there was alot discussed and it was a good thing for me to attend, even if it was grudgingly (I think the biggest reason was because I was missing out on a girl's night with some friends outside the ward getting manicures and pedicures) Just some food for thought for those of you parents that feel like me sometimes!

2 comments:

Katie said...

um, HELLO! you could have said something about the girls night. It would have been totally fine for you to ditch me. :) Glad you could come though.

Brett and Shendi said...

i never think about it sometimes either. its a good way to look at things and switch around. thanks for sharing. -shendi